ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize
