watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
