Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Drunk is not a location!
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize