Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
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