im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
