I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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