He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
