By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Randomize
