Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Randomize
