Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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