I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
