also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize