i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Randomize
