the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize
