return my video game
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Randomize
