I hope mine doesn't look like that
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
