Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
