the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
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