dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
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I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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