It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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