Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
