marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Randomize
