it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
