Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
we're making bets on your personal life
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
You are the jesus of drinking
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