i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
God gave him joint rollers for hands
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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