Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Randomize
