Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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