So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
