Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
