Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
