I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
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