Someone shit on the floor
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
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i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
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Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
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