I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
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I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
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He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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