Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
