I wish I could teleport
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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