We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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