I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
We just shotgunned beers for America
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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