No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
