New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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