You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
