Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
