I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
