he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
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