This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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