Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Randomize