apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
