brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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