Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
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