It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
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