currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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